No is never easy to hear. Let’s face it, rejection sucks. It’s that much harder when it’s in response to something you’re passionate or excited about. Whether you just applied for your dream job, pitched a new project at work, or were just hoping to get your friends together this weekend, that two-letter word can really sting.
Typically, we see the word no as a roadblock, rather than a speed bump. You’ve probably been told a thousand times, “don’t take no for an answer.” In truth, sometimes no really does mean no— but that’s a conversation for a different article. When it comes to things like work, school, and personal life, simply refining your approach could lead you to the yes you’re looking for.
Rejection can really take the wind out of your sails, but it doesn’t have to be that way. Channel that energy into motivation, and start working toward getting the answer you want. Recognizing that there’s always room for improvement is the first step in accepting a no answer. Remember that there’s a reason you’re being told no. Trust that the person delivering that answer knows best. Viewing rejection as an opportunity will push you to work toward something even better. It doesn’t have to be a scary word. Changing your perspective can make no something that ignites a fire in you and inspires you to be better, work harder, and accomplish more.
When it comes to confronting a no, retrace your steps and take a long, hard look at your approach. There’s likely some improvement you can make to your initial idea or request. That doesn’t mean it was a bad idea, just that there are ways it could be better. Try talking to the person you’re seeking approval from to see what they think or ask a neutral source for their opinion. There are plenty of ways to deal with a no. It’s up to you to figure out which is best for you.
A great place to start would be to ask yourself what the strengths of your idea are. While it may be difficult at first to get your hopes up only to have your bubble burst, you should look at this as an opportunity to make a good idea better. If you’re having a hard time verbalizing what you like about your idea, there’s a good chance the person you’re explaining it to doesn’t understand either. Take the time to flesh it out a little more.
It’s completely normal to be scared of being told no. Nobody wants to be rejected from something they’ve poured their heart and soul into. The thing is, fear can be paralyzing. It can stop you from taking the first step and sharing an idea in the work place, at school, or with friends. The worst that can happen is someone says no. You’re going to hear it a thousand times in your life, so you better get used to it. You won’t be the first person who’s had an idea turned down, and you won’t be the last. There are plenty of other opportunities out there for you. Look at this as a stepping stone to working towards something better-suited for you.
Maybe you were a little too ambitious with your approach, or you weren’t ambitious enough. Whatever the case, don’t be discouraged when someone tells you no. Take that denial and run with it. We’ve been conditioned all our lives to think that rejection means we aren’t good enough, aren’t smart enough, or are just plain wrong. BREAKING NEWS: That couldn’t be further from the truth. Adjusting to seeing no as a challenge will allow you to quickly move on from the sinking feeling that comes with rejection and get motivated to get that yes you’re looking for.
